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Suicide Club

Source: Crawfordsville Daily Journal Tuesday, 25 October 1892

Mrs. James Watson of Green Street Attempts to Break Through the Gates of the Great Beyond
A few days ago The Journal felt constrained to make a few derogatory remarks concerning the 42 caliber revolver, and the box of “Rough on Rats” as implements of self destruction, and advised all young society folks who believed this world to be a fleeting show for man’s illusion given, to seek other methods of leaving this vale of tears than those mentioned. We now, in the light of recent events, are compelled to warn our youth against the ineffectual morphine capsule.

Mrs. James Watson, of North Green Street, attempted to shuffle off this mortal coil last night under its seductive influence and made an inglorious flunk. Mrs. Watson is the beloved wife of “Hostler Jim” of Walters barns and has been living about 40 blocks from her cherished husband for some little time and the fact seemed to pray on her mind and gnaw on her damask cheek. She has been residing with Mrs. Sam Hoshwinder and last night at 9 o’clock it was ascertained she had swallowed enough morphine to kill a drove of elephants. Dr. Gott was hastily summoned and having arrived with his sunny smile proceeded to pump the good lady out amid the vociferous applause of the neighborhood. This morning Mrs. Watson was on the high road to recovery and will no doubt be about in the course of a few days as chipper as a ground squirrel.

The “Sent For and Couldn’t Come Club” is said to be in secret session today considering a matter of importance. The members are all men who have made unsuccessful attempts at suicide and the propriety of admitting ladies is now under discussion.

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