GRAY - Sadie
Sadie Gray, the fond but faithless wife of Andy Gray, who rivals Rufus Wells in the capture of garbage, is once more in the body of the county jail and in adjoining cells are those truly excellent colored gentlemen, Jim Gill and Simp Bell. It seems that these simian bounders have for some time past been noisy rivals for the somewhat faded favors of shifty Sadie. She smiled, if an exhibition of her saffron fangs could be called smiling, on both apes and consequently a fierce rivalry grew up between them. When Simp was favored Jim chewed broken glass in blind rage and when Jim and Sadie strolled by moonlight Simp refused to be comforted. Naturally things could not go on thus forever and Monday Jim took the initiative and incidentally a good licking. Simp and Sadie, considerably under the influence of cheap beer and cocaine, wobbled unsteadily along Main street a little while after the clock in the steeple boomed 12. Simp carried a billiard cue and razor and felt tolerably secure. At the corner of Walnut & Main they met Mr. Gill who likewise carried a billiard cue. Both men snarled and clubbed their cues while Sadie skated up a tree box like a lizard up a stump. Simp and Jim exchanged the compliments of the evening in the soft and liquid language for which both are justly famous and after the close of the classics went after each other tooth, toe nail and billiard cue. The resounding whacks of the cues of their adamantine pates their roars of rage and the affrightened squawks of the delicious little bunch of feminity up the tree box awoke the sleepers of the blocks about. Up and down the street the battle raged, both men fighting like rival tom cats on a clothes line. Senator Johnston attempted to drive them off but they paid no more attention to him than if he had never seen the state house. Snapping, snarling, swearing, and club swining Simp and Jim wallowed about in the dust. Up Main Street, down Walnut and back again to Main, biting, scratching, spitting, urged on by Sadie the siren, the black brutes battled for supremacy. But all things have an end. Finally Simp managed to give Jim a tremendous whack on the shins with what was left of his cue and Jim fell in the dust writhing in pain. Simp then leaped upon him with his hob nailed shoes and tramped his face until it simply lost all resemblance to that of a human, although it might be parenthetically stated that it never did bear very much such resemblance. Woman, lovely woman, then slid down from her perch in the shade tree and decamped with the victor. Jim was picked up and carried to the office of Dr. Sigmond where nearly a 100 stitches were taken to sew up the gashes in his head and great chunks of gravel and dirt were dug out of his mangled face. Later in the night Simp and Sadie were captured and were both jailed.